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Iran celebrates entire week without anyone saying or doing anything mental

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Iran celebrates entire week without anyone saying or doing anything mental

Country lauds “remarkable achievement” after seven days without lunacy

TEHRAN: There were scenes of celebration across Iran yesterday as the country recorded its first seven-day stretch in 10 years without anybody saying or doing anything ridiculous.

According to information released by officials in Tehran, over the past week there have been zero reports of time travelling machines, monkeys launched into space, attempts to sue Hollywood or hilariously Photoshopped images of Iranian fighter jets soaring over mountains. The same period has also seen president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad fail to make any bold statements about wanting to be an astronaut or his opinions concerning the holocaust, 9/11 or the wearing of ties, while clerics have refrained from blaming women for bad weather.

“Given the sort of lunacy that we’ve seen over the past few months, it’s a truly remarkable achievement we can all be proud of,” said government spokesman Farbod Durian. “Let’s see if we can make it to the two-week mark.”

At the time of going to press, Ahmadinejad was preparing to release a statement in which he condemned the makers the popular HBO drama Game of Thrones as “Zionist wolves” and announced his desire to enter the next Eurovision Song Contest.

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