Iranians disappointed that sanctions relief almost entirely made up of Ally McBeal DVD boxsets

TEHRAN: Hopes that new sanctions relief might help repair Iran’s crippled economy were dashed yesterday, after it was revealed that the US imports that have landed in the country since the nuclear deal was signed have been almost entirely made up of Ally McBeal DVD boxsets.

“When we heard about last week’s historic deal in Geneva and the partial lifting of the economic blockade, we just assumed it would be vital automobile or plane parts, or even some liquid assets earned from our overseas oil sales,” complained Houri Kapeesh, a shop assistant in Tehran.

“But for some reason, so far all we’ve got are these old Ally Mcbeal DVDs, and not even the full collection, just seasons one, two and four, plus a few Home Improvement and ER DVDs.”

However, the news hasn’t been greeted with dismay from all corners of Iran.

“I absolutely love Ally Mcbeal and have been waiting to see the third season since 1999,” said Leila Crabapple, a gym instructor in Qoz. “Thank you America.”