Israel Just Can’t Understand What All The Fuss Is About Kids Being Locked Up

Israeli authorities have weighed into the ongoing debate in the US about immigrant children being forcibly separated from their families, with Benjamin Netanyahu telling reporters that he “just can’t understand the fuss” being made.

“Honestly, we do this sort of the thing all the time and nobody cares,” the Israeli prime minister continued. “And we don’t even have to pretend that they’re staying in some sort of luxurious summer camp either… this is just what you do to your neighbours, right?”

Added Israel Defense Forces chief of staff Gadi Eizenkot: “We’re delighted to see our good friends in America successfully adopting our proven and much-loved policies of separating young chlldren from their parents and forced internment. With Israel’s famously firm, yet twinkly-eyed sternness, we hope to see countless more families split up and traumatised to ensure a new generation of dispossessed and damaged children will grow up into revenge-thirsty warriors for us to fight.”