With the historic Scottish referendum just days away, proud Scots living across the Middle East have come out passionately in support for the independence of a country they never, ever plan to live in again.
“As a born-and-bred Scot, I have always dreamed of the day when my country can make important policy decisions of its own, such as taxation, one of the many reasons I shan’t ever be returning,” said Sean McTaggart, a property developer in Bahrain.
“Cut me and I bleed tartan,” added Cheryl Armstrong, a teacher in Abu Dhabi. “Which I why I’m calling on all of my fellow countryman to vote ‘yes’ on 18 September and finally forge a truly independent Scotland with the all necessary power to work for itself and its proud people. Not that I’d ever go back there. Far too f***ing cold and miserable.”