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UAE launches world’s most luxurious airstrikes against ISIS

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UAE launches world’s most luxurious airstrikes against ISIS

Gold-plated ordnance used in iconic, 7-star military intervention

The Gulf states stepped up their involvement in the fight against ISIS this morning with the launch of what are believed to be the world’s most luxurious airstrikes to date.

UAE F-16 fighter jets carried out a series of “7-star” strikes against Iraqi oil refineries under the control of the Islamic State, with reports stating that gold-plated and diamond-adorned ordnance had been dropped on the targets.

“The UAE’s world-beating levels of luxury aren’t solely confined to its hospitality industries,” explained an air force spokesperson. “With these iconic, VIP standard bombing raids, the UAE is raising the bar for international military intervention.”

Models of the expected flattened ISIS strongholds and facilities are expected to be installed in shopping malls across the UAE, allowing families to experience the platinum-class excitement and thrill of the aerial bombardment during the next ‘Summer Surprises’ festival.

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10 Comments

10 Comments

  1. Kyle Flanagan

    February 18, 2015 at 12:09 pm

    Just the kind of news I needed to cheer me up on a slow day.

    That’s it. You guys have my nomination for The Pulitzer.

  2. JJ

    February 18, 2015 at 1:11 pm

    You guys are so stoooooooopid. ROTFLMAO………

  3. Matt

    February 19, 2015 at 7:27 am

    By Gulf you meant Persian Gulf, right?

    • arabia4ever

      February 25, 2015 at 9:14 pm

      No Arabian 🙂

  4. mobotonix

    February 19, 2015 at 12:45 pm

    I wouldn’t mind being bombed with gold! hey we need some bombing here too! yes i’m poor.

  5. Qris A'f

    February 19, 2015 at 4:26 pm

    Another difinition of laxury I’ve never heard of before… #UAE

  6. Hans Blix

    March 2, 2015 at 10:11 am

    i really hope that the UAE are not using depleted gold and diamonds.
    that would be wrong

  7. boff

    March 5, 2015 at 2:04 pm

    Prada bling, Prada BOOM!

  8. Anonymous

    March 17, 2015 at 7:46 pm

    Must we overdo everything?
    Why not further invest these riches into existing organisations struggling to resolve wealth disparities around the world?

  9. Glenda Jordan Coelho

    March 17, 2015 at 7:50 pm

    Must we overdo everything?
    Why not invest these riches into existing organisations struggling to resolve wealth disparities around the world?…

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