World of Warcraft sanctions force Ahmadinejad to pull plug on Iran’s nuclear program

Ahmadinejad’s blood elf paladin, Patsy.

TEHRAN: Just days after US sanctions saw World of Warcraft servers blocked in Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad this morning announced that he was pulling the plug on the country’s nuclear program. The Iranian president also invited inspectors from the International Atomic Energy Agency to oversee the dismantling of Iran’s various nuclear facilities, and called out to Israel to enter into a new round of peaceful, cooperative dialogue.

Ahmadinejad, who is believed to be a level 39 blood elf paladin, made the shocking series of announcements in a prepared statement during this morning’s parliamentary session in Tehran.

“I have not taken this decision lightly,” he said. “But when you’ve sat alone in your pants every night for past two years and are just a few points off hitting level 40 – which allows you to summon the epic Charger Warhorse AND train your paladin to wear plate armour – you really can’t just lie back and do nothing. Besides, Nasrallah’s guild has a big raid on the Orc castle this weekend.”